"I will feel like a total failure and a bad husband if I don’t come up with a solution soon..."
"Everyone is turning off the NHS Covid app in case they get notified to self-isolate."
Emily said she likes drawing on bananas with a ballpoint pen.
"Putinism with posh accents" is how he described the government's attempt to tamper with the BBC.
"My wife knows all the technical terms for the TV game show Tipping Point."
“We watched Oxford United beat Portsmouth in the League 1 playoffs. Oxford had cardboard cutouts in the stands.”
I always knew there was something deeply iffy about the idea to link Ireland and Scotland with bridge
My wife reckons Covid could have done society a big favour.
Series 3 of Spooks was a turkey and Series 4 is all plot and no character.
Researchers in the US have discovered that Republicans are more vaccine-hesitant than Democrats.
News that a diver got swallowed and spat out by a whale triggers the memory of a whale-watching trip.
Hordes of pleasure seekers grabbed the chance to sniff laughing gas and crap all over the place.
My wife rolled her eyeballs when I said I'll build a wall out of the mountain of books we have in storage.
Stuart revealed that at his posh-boy school he played a prehistoric game called Fives.
DIY dentistry kits are available online. Some people are repairing broken crowns with superglue.
There's a pet-stress crisis looming!
"I’m not sure the Cummings-Johnson Death Plan to kill off the elderly is working."